The Queen

You stand up there
tall and proud
black and proud
with your nude lace up heels,
cheetah print maxi skirt
with a slit up the side
thick leather belt that
wraps around your black
skin tight leotard
covered by a light beige duster
with big tufts of fur on the collar–
I admire your look
and I admire you even more
after you tell the large crowd you are
and then I admire you even more
as you begin to tell us about your life
how you left for four years
and came back just today
how people had run you out
when they were supposed to have
had your back
were supposed to have supported you
in your darkest, loneliest
most confusing moments
and instead, when you did not fit their
image of the “queen”
(which is what they called you
and you begged to differ)
they pretended you did not exist
and so you asked
(I ask)
what is this then
the program we call
a God-given program?
if we can’t see ourselves in each other
if we can’t remember that we are
all the same
that we all come from the same place
no matter our sexual identity, creed, religion
or lack of religion
and with that crack of your voice
the quavering of your chin
seducing one tear or more tears
out of my eyes
telling us all of your pain and suffering
I heard my story too
and his and her story
and probably everybody’s story
and I thought, well dammit
you are still the Queen
even if you are not in your eyes
but mine
and even if you weren’t or aren’t
the woman we should be bowing to
I still respect you for
being you
and sharing with me all of you
which makes me
a better person–


I choose love

wandering the streets of NYC
I have a plan
to not have a plan
I slowly float over tiny brown puddles
waiting for you to get out of my way
sorry that was mean
I mean, I’m letting you pass first
stuck in between a black wrought iron fence
and a tiny yellow dandelion
I choose love
I choose love–

Beach Ball

Listening to you
repeat every word I say
like it’s all new
it is new
it’s so
so very new to you
you pick up a piece and say red
it’s yellow
you pick up another piece
it’s yellow
you say yellow
the claymation on the screen
as I type this
“koo koo”
it’s Russian for
peek a boo
I didn’t understand why
until I heard you repeat it
(so much easier for babies)
and here we are
day after day
week after week
month after month
nearing the 2 year mark
and you are everything I hoped for
everything I dreamed of
more than I could have imagined
as we awaken another morning
rest unto another night
looking forward with glistening eyes
thanking the Lord
for another day here
to live in peace
and as much harmony
as my small mind
as I will allow myself to feel
on this little
blue ball


Q train 5:12 pm

not quite on the train

I am waiting on the

Dusty old platform 

Trying to forget today’s foibles

Listening to the monotonous repitition 

of the drone repeating the same tone

The train is on its way you say

The train is on its way 

And we all wait.

This communal huddling

Eventual ushering onto the ancient

spoiled car 

The rankness crisp–


The train is here

I need to dip–

Let it go

Waiting for the day to be over
The ringing in my ears
Immature thoughts
Brainwashed by the media
Their thoughts not their own
While I sit here and stew
they have no idea
they know nothing about the past, present or future
Watching the clock tick
I worry so much about where we are headed
I’m angry that they don’t care
I’m tired and
I’m so so tired
that this hasn’t worked
but why can’t I just let it go
let it go
let it go
Why can’t I just let it go

My Soulmate

You like my posts
buried underneath
twixt recipes
and other poems–
As I lay my head on
your shoulder this night
I mused how far we’ve come
not from
standing still
but moving here to there
traveling to the outer space
of our minds
into the sordid depths of
our disease and
then back again
through the healing fire
a prayer heard
a wish granted
sometimes so slow like
the crawl of this express train
waiting in the dark
looking beyond the black
I remembered how much
I love you
How very much
you are indeed
My one and only
My Soulmate–

Sparking Eyes and Breath of Life

Your eyes sparkle today
in a way I have not seen before
They move
like stars
on a cool night
out in the country
for all the silent children to be
far from any moving truck
bumbling down a hot city lane
distant from the potholes
or stagnant puddles
or dirty candy wrappers.
I find myself
loving you more and more
each day
Connecting with you
like a new lover does
like a moth to a flame
each kiss brighter and more
than any breath of life
I’ve ever thought I’ve taken–

Pumping and Feeding

Up at 11
and then 2
The things that I do for you
How many hours more
will I sleep
not sleep
It’s okay
because I have you
in my life

The Next Party

Spin the record
pass it along
From one dark hand
to another
The music hasn’t stopped–
Our hearts haven’t stopped beating
The womb is still in creation
and Mother Earth will continue
to spin for you
One body
One mind
One record
until the next party starts–