The College Search

sitting in this warm room
where students go to meet their needs
they want to go to college
to explore their current wants and desires
I remember being in this sort of room
so many years ago
how did I know to go downstairs and
talk to the college advisor
speaking with him was cloudy
even back then
the skeletal frame of mine
short black hair
bangs
red lipstick
long gray coat with 
white fur around the collar
chipped black nail polish to boot
I was the self-proclaimed queen of
shopping by myself on 
8th street
scouring the shoe stores for a hot deal
I somehow managed to sweetly settle
into isolation without knowing there
could be something better
more manageable in terms of
learning how to love myself
by loving others
or in being of service to others
I could in it 
find myself
but now I find myself sitting here
thinking of the college search
comparing mine to theirs
knowing their journey will be just
as fruitful
because the universe wants everything
for you
for them
for itself
reflecting its ever effervescent light
to shine
up and
down
for one small second
lighting a fire 
in the dim hearts
of man–

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